Wednesday, January 06, 2010

Omastar Comics #25

Today Omastar puts his money where his mouth is and predicts that one day, many millions of years into the future sentient beings will extract discharge from a Miltank, wait for it to go off and then eat it after dinner with crackers.

Where the hell do you get this stuff Omastar? That's CRAZY TALK.

Cranidos ain't believing none of it

Almost as bad as that time he had a nightmare that beings would cut up Octillerys and eat them in a LASAGNA.

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Monday, August 17, 2009

Omastar comics #24

OCs fans may recognise this comic as Omastar Comics 11 but with a different last panel.

This was the original ending to this comic but when we ran it past test audiences they reacted pretty negatively towards it even with the ace black sludge cameo. We agonised for hours over it but decided to cut it for the final release. This version accidentally slipped into our display at Comic Con last year and the feedback from the fans was overwhelmingly positive, which shows you should stick to your gut feeling. This is by far my favourite ending and as you can see with this original ending Omastar's comments in panel 2 now make more sense.

Due to the credit crunch it's getting harder to get the A-listers to appear in these. Hence this cheap rerun. Sorry guys but on the budget allocation we've currently got we're talking at talent around the Stantler level. Seriously. And it costs more if we want them to say anything.

In other gaming news:

Left 4 Dead 2- Yeah but is it really any better than Resident Evil Outbreak file 2?
Madden again- Which means that all the US gaming sites become boring and unintelligible for a month or two.
Resident Evil 5- Still playing and loving it.

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Thursday, July 16, 2009

Omastar Comics #23

Today marks the return of the internationally adored fictional cephalopod, Omastar. Originally, Breloom was to star in her own comic. Breloom Comics? Would have never worked.

This week Omastar is annoyed by giving away all the best secrets and getting none in return. Always the last to know. God. Just, just why do I even bother?

We've all been there!

The monologue in panel 3 was used in scene 2 of the popular film version of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Did I see a penny of royalties? Did I f.....

In other gaming news:

It is the onset of the summer drought so stack up on sun cream and go outside for a bit yar?
It's Buddha burning time in England! I really want to see them flames people.
Eidos, we'd be happy to give your new game 95/100, just send us a signed copy of the game to www.hotmail.com
We read Brian Ashcraft's book! Much like our personal hero, the book was impersonal and missed the point but we forgive it because of its lovely flowing locks [hair]!

Next week we're going to Capcom HQ to play Dead Rising 2 and Resident Evil Darkside Chronicles. Expect a full preview with pictures right here. You just don't get this kind of service on other websites.

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Friday, June 12, 2009

Omastar Comics #22

Hidden beneath literally millimetres of wit, satire and irony, the joke in this latest installment of the paint created, pixellated, irregularly posted, fully clickable, popular webcomic Omastar Comics will be missed by all but the sharpest of readers.
This week Omastar is minding his own fucking business thank you very much.
THe Sheva Nude cheat you are looking for is not in this post I am afraid


In other gaming news:

We turned 3 years old a while back. The party was awesome thanks for all those who came along.
Guitar Hero 5! looks like Guitar Hero.
Dread Kong in the upcoming New Play Control! Donkey Kong Jungle Beat has been officially confirmed as racist. Expect N'Gai Kroal to be on the case ASAP.

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Thursday, April 16, 2009

Exclusive content TGAM wallpaper

This is a once in a lifetime opportunity to download a wallpaper. FREE. That is right totally free. This is just one of the gifts from the team here at TGAM to our readers who have stuck with us for nearly three whole years.

How to get your free TGAM Wallpaper. See the image below? Just click on it. You will be taken to another window with a big version of the image so you may wish to write these instructions down on a piece of paper so you can follow them when you are in another window. You then need to right click on the image (Use the B button if you are on a Mac) and click on save as desktop. Or is it use as desktop? Something about a desktop. Then, MAGIC! YOU NOW HAVE THE EXCLUSIVE WALLPAPER. You can also save it as a JPEG and use it on other computers. Or on your Wii even.

The image was created* by one Tatsuo Kayagumi, lead dolly on Resident Evil 2 (GC version). For blind readers it is a picture showing the legendary Omastar, star of Omastar Comics, as a giant peering over a mountain. He can see a meadow.

We are actually quite annoyed by the picture. We asked for one with the Nemesis dressed up as Jill Valentine. But we got Omastar. Omastar the prick. Did you know he has his own twitter page? And that page has more followers than TGAM has readers? Annoying.


*Image could not be uploaded at this time for reasons only known to blogger.

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Friday, January 30, 2009

Omastar Comics #21

The first Omastar comic of 2009. Will it be any good? The answer is a single click away unless you have good eyesight.

Today, Omastar tells Shieldon about his wishes for how his body is to be treated when he eventually departs this life. The comic then shows that his wishes were not carried out. This subject and the way in which the story ends may be a sensitive topic to some people so they may wish to give this one a miss. It's okay though because in the next comic he becomes president of Tethys. The first ammonoid president of a pan-global oceany state thing. It's a very uplifting story about overcoming adversity, furry sidekicks, friends who fall out but make up again and an eventual happy ending. Parts of the comic were edited out for American release. Namely, a scene where Omastar is forced to snort a dildo made out of rusty razor blades on prom night by the school bullies. As the prom king and queen laugh and dance around gaily.

Not suitable for children under three. Small parts.
IN OTHER NEWS.

No gaming news. The horizon is bleak. If it carries on like this we might have to put some serious thought into getting excited about 7/10 franchise, Killzone.

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Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Omastar Comics #20

According to the dictionary, apathy is worse than murder. At our recent book group, this issue came up and it was one that went right to the heart of our old friend Omastar. For years he toiled away in underwater caves thinking about how to cure apathy. He thought really hard. Somedays he would think so hard he would need to go for a swim or have a lay down in order to relax. Then, the cure came to him in a dream one night. We were lucky enough to be there on the scene when he cured the world of apathy thus bumping murder a little bit up the list of bad things. Here it is:

Sometimes all it takes is saying a part of your own name and great changes can be made

Wow, that Omastar, what a guy.

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Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Omastar Comics #19

This week Omastar travels to a universe where copyright and anachronisms don't exist.

Drawing vomit in paint isn't hard, I just couldn't bring myself to look at the comic any longer. There's something so wrong about it. <br />

Christ! Just what the fuck is wrong with the people who upload shit to deviant art? For God's sake, it doesn't even make sense. Why would this happen? Who appreciates this abomination?





































/fap

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Thursday, May 08, 2008

Omastar Comics #18

Back by popular demand. Unfortunately, due to the Hollywood Writer's Strike, Omastar wrote this one himself. As you can see it's not the greatest of adventures.

This one time, I was in bed and I saw this ghost. Totally true

EXCLUSIVE REVIEW OF OMASTAR COMICS 18. They're just cranking them out now. It used to have a plot but now it's just like Lost. 4/10.

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Thursday, April 17, 2008

Omastar Comics #17

Could it be? Has he? All those years of research which is hampered by underwater labspaces? It all paid off?

At last! The world is changed.
Wow! Things will never be the same again. That. Is for sure.

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Thursday, April 10, 2008

Omastar Comics #16

Back by popular demand. From the brink of selling his body to feed his children we bring out Omastar to perform for your viewing pleasure in these dark dark times.
For too long the internet has gone without a pokemon themed sprite comic adaptation of Beckett's playOh that Omastar. What a gook. In other news:

No gaming news. It's April for god's sake.

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Monday, January 07, 2008

Omastar Comics #15, AKA Forgot about Dre

No Christmas way back then. Still doesn't stop Omastar anachronistically looking forward to it? Does it?
Panel two is Jingle Star. Omastar's premptive take on the carol that would end up as Jingle Bells

Whatever, Omastar. You'd be bored after like two years of it.

In other news:

Halo 4 storyline leaked by Bungie! Here it is especially for you, That Guy's Reader: "There's a man in the green suit. He a shooty man. Hes killin all the bad ones till the end when the shooty man maybe dead. He not dead. He just go away until Halo 5". EPIC stuff I think you'll agree.

Also, rumours that the Rockband drum set has traces of arsenic in it are abound. Be very careful the next time you play Rockband because you'll look like a fucking tit in front of all your friends. Oh and also the poison too.

"Rape me" by Nirvana confirmed for Singstar in April this year. Too late for the office parties but an essential addition to the DLC that ought to keep Singstar afloat for a while longer.

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Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Omastar Comics #14

Omastar has been feeling bad lately. He can't drink without getting drunk. He would blame videogames but there aren't videogames yet. They wouldn't work in the sea anyways. He can't even listen to gangsta rap either because mammals haven't evolved past the "nose noise" stage in their evolution yet.

Homage a trois!
Yeah that's right North. We can all copy! How do you like them apples???

EDIT: Because it's not really worth a new post. I hate being a gamer it means you download lots of shit that you don't need or will ever look at again. Especially free shit like that Good writing for games guide and Breaking the Mold Bioshock PDF.
Also, btw, games people no one really cares about the art of Halo/Half Life/Bioshock. You read it once and think "Oh, OK so originally the mad doctor had three less wire tentacles coming out of his head". Then that information is instantly forgotten and never needed again. The only reason gamers buy The Art of ......... books is to try to make the games bookshelf look a little less shameful than the veritable "I'm a child in a man's body" statement that is a collection of all of the resident evil, starcraft, halo and warcraft novels. I even have a Command and Conquer novel. Fucking shit I never use but am too stupid to throw away.


I wish I didn't I really do.

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Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Omastar Comics #13

Many people don't realise that Omastar Comics is not a recent phenomenon. We do which makes us superior and veritable kings in the eyes of other people who "camp" the wikipedia pages for Omastar Comics. Omastar originally made a debut in the 1922 silent comic, Oma Lordy. The original comic was recently rediscovered by comic archivists in the heart of Russia. Here it is for your eyes only.

Some things should be left undiscovered I think. Thrilling I think you'll agree no?

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Monday, October 29, 2007

Resident Evil: Wnakery

There comes a time in every blogs life, when all the rantings, drivel, and fantasies actually pay off!

You remember “Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within”, do you remember the feeling you felt when it was first coming out, when you though it was going to be everything “Final Fantasy: Advent Children” was?

Well it’s that time again except it not Squeenix its… CAPCOM, and instead of Final fantasy it’s

RESIDENT FUCKING EVIL

Now I know that Resident evil has not had the best track record at the cinema, with that pissy trilogy, of defiled characters, and tainted plotlines. But this time Sony (You better not pull a PS3 on this one, you fucks) and Capcom are copulating in the hope of conceiving a CG Movie. Of Resident evil proportions

Catch all the news here.



What we want to see in Biohazard: Degeneration or we will actually start to MDK people starting with whoever is the nearest. This is the definitive list any slight variation and it's curtains for everyone.

1) Jill, Chris, Claire, Rebecca, Leon, Barry, Wesker, Enricho, Joseph, Brad, Richard, Edward, Forest, Ken, Will Smith AKA Marvin, Joe Kendo, Kevin, Annette and Billy Birkin, Ada, Carlos, Brian Irons, Ben Bertolucci, Nicholai and the others, Mr X, The Nemesis, the Ashfords, Hunk, Tofu, female zombie, fat zombie, hunters, hunter gammas, lickers, Tyrant, Titan, Neptune, Cerberus, the white zombie from the first Resident Evil all the characters from outbreak including sub characters.

2) The whole film should be Canon and fit perfectly within the storyline of the games even though they conflict themselves. The one exception it that although Sherry Birkin looks exactly how she does in the game, we are told very explicitly from the start of the movie that she has just turned 16.

3) Ideally the film should be a number of days long and cover events from Resident Evil Zero all the way through to the End of Resident Evil 3.

STARS4) There will be Cameos from Dante, Chun Li, Ashley, Frank West, Morrigan, Regina and the alien from Under the Skin

5) About half way through the film there will be a scene where Hunk dances move for move to Rihanna's Umbrella. See here for more.

6) Bewbies, Jill bewbies, Claire bewbies, Ada bewbies, Nemesis bewbies, Dante Bewbies, Annette Bewbies, Alexia Bewbies, Zombie female Bewbies. And a bit of muff wouldnt go astray either. Assuming Capcom want to include the Canon game Resident evil: DS (douche simulator), they can perhaps prove once and for all that Zombie female does have Green and bloody douche Juice.

7) When you have watched the film once, you get to watch it again with alternative outfits.

8) The opening line of the film will be "That guy's a maniac. Why'd he bite me?". The film then flashes back to the beginning.

9) DVD extras will include:

A long overdue heartfelt thanks to TGAM, the blog that has been keeping Capcom's reputation in good stead since Resident Evil 4.

Cell by cell comparisons of Jill Valentine's biff and Sienna Guillory, proving CG to actually be better than RL.

Eliza's Story: how drugs and nymphomania got her cut from Resident evil 2 and replaced with the iconic Claire.

The Biohazard 4D film with 3D goggles.

Audio Commentary from the Nemesis and Marvin Branagh.

Special Audio Commentary from Dante, whilst receiving head from Richie.

10)The mansion should be the mansion from the original Resident Evil. Not the remake because that mansion confuses us and scares us because we are unfamiliar with it.

We're just so darn excited and we can't wait for our ideas to come to fruition. How excited you ask? Well Omastar was perplexed at the involuntery responses we had here at TGAM.


DISCLAIMER: If this turns out to be rumour then we will release the T-Virus without warning. Have your zombie plans ready people.

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Thursday, October 18, 2007

Omastar Comics #11

Read all about it. In this week's comic Omastar is at the time of life where it is pertinent to worry about how one will be remembered. That's the kind of thing you get to dwell on when you've been fired for the production of lacklustre fanservice goods.

HINT:It isn't for avidly looking after the Omastar page on Bulbapedia In other gaming news:

No news. Which, is supposedly good news?

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Monday, October 08, 2007

Omastar Comics #10

It's the long awaited return of Omastar Comics. In this week's edition, Omastar tries to make us feel better for this.

OMA!
Yeah. Thanks but no thanks Omastar. You are fired. Get out and leave all those PPUps I've seen you taking from the stationery cupboard.

I'm not being racist or anything but fucking water types.....

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Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Omastar Comics #9

This week Omastar tells us about the time he fought racism, real racism, not the internet kind.

No you didn't Aerodactyl, you were too busy doing barrel rolls to impress the chicksAlas, that stupid kid getting in the way just as you were about to finish off the bad guy. That's how it always goes dude. ALWAYS

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Monday, August 20, 2007

Omastar Comics #8

This week in Omastar Comics, the web's 2871st most popular gaming webcomic, Omastar weighs up fatherhood or a career. A decision that all fictional cephalopods have to make at one point or another in their lives.

Oh shut up Kabutops just because you are a woman does not make you opinion count anymore than Omastar's!

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Monday, August 13, 2007

Omastar Comics #7 & A post. Kinda

So it looks like pokemania is taking over the world* and at the same time nothing of interest is happening in the rest of gaming. Seriously, check Gamespot's news page. Snorarama. Looks like everyone took the month off because they aren't going to knock Diamond and Pearl off the top spots (except umm Transformers the DS game apparently).

Anyway this week in Omastar Comics, well, see for yourself. This one goes out to TTEchidna in a bad way.


So yeah, this is how Omastar got banned from the MoRTo (Music of Rock Type origin awards) because, his rap is all about how some rock types think they are grass types. They speak like grass types and they act like grass types. HELL they even dance like grass types. Unfortunately, for Omastar Type-ist slurs don't go unnoticed by the judges BUT WHAT DO THEY KNOW FRICKIN NORMAL TYPES. Everyone knows that normal types are a bunch of Salac eating, silk scarf wearing pokedex fillers.


*This may not strictly be true but wikipedia doesn't have an article on "Is Pokemania taking over the world?" so what do I know about it?

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Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Omastar Comics #6

Yeah Omastar Comics number 6!

This week Omastar takes a little stroll down memory lane. He doesn't often like to reminisce because then it dawns on him that HE HAS LIVED A LIFE AND DIED ALREADY. He didn't ask to be resurrected. No siree.
Oh man he was so naive as an Omanyte, just listen to what he used to say. I'M GLAD I WAS NEVER THAT NAIVE
Next on Omastar Comics:- Controversy at the MORTO (Music of Rock Type Origin) Awards.

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Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Omastar Comics #5

Yep it's been at least 4 posts but here is another Canon comic in the ongoing saga.

This week Omastar has lost his bleeding keys

You don't even have keys you mental Rock type

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Thursday, July 19, 2007

Omastar Comics #4

When laziness kicks in!

Today Omastar goes to Japan to buy cool games and merchandise. Oh boy! Japan is so great all gamers should live there! Click for a bigger version.

What? You didn't know he could speak Japanese? Me neither compadre. Me neither. Coming soon: Something that takes more than five minutes to think about and do! Possible posts:

1) A book review of the Command & Conquer Tiberium Sun paperback I bought the other day
2) Nothing else. Life is very depressing at the moment
3) A story about the time we met the guy who made paperboy
4) Something copied and pasted from kotaku with two lines of text about what we think about it
5) The death of EDGE. How EDGE has got increasingly unreadable in recent months

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Friday, July 13, 2007

Omastar Comics #3

One more before bedtime. Today Omastar discusses (angrily) the english on holiday in Spain
Well jesus christ Omastar why don't you write a frigging book about it. Jees!

Next week on TGAM:
We do a really boring review of an old game to make ourselves sound better in the oh-so-intellectual field of writing about videogames.

Richie, the supposed co-author of the world's second greatest videogames blog in the world, That guy's a maniac thinks about doing a post. CO-AUTHOR UNCONVINCED

Nintendo make an original Wii game, exclusive right here. Apparently it is controllable.

We explore the 'PS3 online' rumour sweeping the internet. Click here for a sneak preview of the result

Counter Strike Priapism Syndrome: We get all the details on this disturbing medical condition affecting America's youth.

Until then, take care and I'll expect to see you 'all*' next week.

*Well I'm guaranteed to be here so Richie, I'm expecting to see you here is what I'm saying

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Thursday, July 12, 2007

Omastar Comics E3 SPECIAL

Omastar is at E3 reporting on all the exciting games things. How did he get a pass I wonder?

Well that isn't right. CRAZEE E3 huh?

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Monday, July 09, 2007

Omastar Comics #2

I will keep posting these as a form of protest until Resident Evil 2 or Resident Evil Outbreak are released on the DS with proper co-op play over Wi-Fi or wireless.

This week Omastar discusses global warming from an extinct marine invertebrate perspective.


Oh shut up Rampardos, you're so easily swayed by the media

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Thursday, July 05, 2007

Omastar Comics #1

Click for the full version. This week, Omastar is anxious about terrorism.After all that! Omastar you noodle

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